Sometimes I feel useless when my chronic illness flares up. Most people that know me would be partly surprised with this statement. But then if they stopped to think about how activistic I can be, they’d see the frustration in needing to stop and rest…to do less.
To be clear, I do NOT like doing less. I would rather do more. I’d rather go, go, go. Not stop, slow down or rest.
I’ve heard from quite a few people who live with chronic illness that they feel the same way. As their productivity goes down, their frustration goes up. And an impatience to just feel better sets in. But alas, chronic illness has a way of telling your body that rest is a priority. And too, importantly, I’ve learned if I rest when my body asks for it, I recover my strength so much faster!
So, I do. I stop. I slow down. I rest. And then I feel…well, useless.
After participating in this cycle for far too long, I decided to make a list. Ever heard of the idea of a “bucket list?” The term that became popularized through the cinema represents a list of those things you’d like to do someday…before you “kick the bucket.” I’m still working on my life bucket list. But I’ve got my bedside bucket list further along.
Sometimes when I’m feeling bad, I’m too sick to check anything off my bedside bucket list. But other days, I spend that forced time in bed or at home to make a difference. I can always send up a prayer. And I can encourage people on Facebook or via email. I can spend time with my kids, or watch a movie with my husband. I can even check the family finances or research something I’m interested in.
I’m sure you’ve got many ways of dealing with your forced down time. What are your favorites? What’s on your chronic illness bedside bucket list?